Review: Self Control by Esa Irvings

Self Control by Esa Irvings

Series: Cantil Snakes #1

Publication date: December 31st, 2021
Pages: 297

Spice: N/A

DNF Percentage: 75% (page 215)

Synopsis:

Mykie Vesper is not having the best week.

As the so-called "princess" of the Cantil gang, she's known as the best of the best. The one who always gets the job done, no matter the consequences. The Valkyrie that can take any man down that challenges the people she loves.

At least, she believes so, until she meets five incredible hot boys that turn her world upside down and get under her skin in ways she never thought possible.

She's known for not being seen at the scene of a crime, but what happens when these boys begin to see her in a different light than she's used to?

Like someone who couldn't hurt a fly.

She has a job to do, but will her control slip the longer she's around these boys?

Or will they discover that she's more dangerous than they thought possible?

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Review:

It has been a hot minute since I have had a book that I just couldn't find a way to finish. I feel often like I have an obligation to the author who put forth their best efforts to make a good book and DNF-ing the book feels like an insult. I try not to make it seem that way. There are some that are abjectly awful and its obvious that the author just threw it out there in hopes of meeting a deadline or to keep the income flowing inward. I don't believe that is the case with this one. However, I had to take a step back and figure out whether I cared about the outcome of the characters or not and if I didn't, that was the time to stop. I reached that point 25% past where I said I would stop if I didn't get more invested in the story. I feel I truly gave the book a good shake. 

The thing that first threw me off a bit was the third person narrative. I am used to either dual POV or a story narrated from the perspective of the female main character. It felt a bit like the author was trying to maintain the third person narrative but at times almost seemed to slip a bit into first person. It was jarring and hard to follow at times. Not to mention it was very difficult to connect with the characters when in a third person narrative. It's a degree of separation that you definitely don't want if you want your audience to feel for the characters enough to be invested in their love lives. That was likely why I couldn't seem to get into the story overall. I felt no tangible connection to keep me reading.

The characters were inconsistent with who they were meant to be. Mykie was meant to be this badass assassin for her gang but she was insecure, shy, and flinched away from touch a lot of the time. That was not the type of person who could go out and kill people without batting an eye. Granted, I know some characters tend to put on a different persona when they are tasked with dangerous jobs, but Mykie was a shaking flower most of the time. Even when she did perform her job there was no noticeable shift in her personality. She was still all squirmy even though she should be used to doing what she was doing. It made her unpleasant to deal with. Add to that the fact that all the guys (save maybe Blaine) were also uber sensitive and insecure. It was not endearing. It didn't make me like them more. It gave me the ick. 

Unfortunately if you lose the flow of the narrative and don't establish some backbones within at least a few of the characters to counteract the uber submissive vibe of the others, it feel unbalanced and unrealistic. We all want to get lost in the books we read. We want to feel like we are not only reading the story of characters we grow to love but also be able to feel the emotions flowing off the pages. This book missed the mark in a lot of ways. The grammatical errors were also a bit of a frustration. This book just wasn't it for me.