Shock Me by Casey Hagen
Series: So Wrong It's Right #1
Publication date: September 1st, 2020
Synopsis:
Mama always warned her that a sense of adventure would only lead to trouble...
Tall. Dark. Delicious. Trouble.
Mabel Lee Montgomery lives in the cradle of the church's stifling arms. A disgraced preacher's dutiful daughter, she's protective of her mama and works endlessly to abolish the stigma left by her father's scandal. But sometimes a woman just has to hang up her good girl ways and break free for a night. What better way than a bachelorette celebration at a wildly popular and completely taboo strip club outside the city limits?
Kellen Savage never thought a brief stint stripping would be more than a quick infusion of cash to repair the wreckage of his tumultuous past. Repelling the hungry pursuit of a serious relationship by the female persuasion just served as an added bonus. Until the prim and proper hot mess sitting front and center gives him an unintended show of her own between her tongue, a cherry, and enticing cleavage. Fascinated by her resilience as she stubbornly tries to keep up with her fast friends, he might just have to rethink his bachelor status.
Call it fate or call it a night of sin ending with a phone number scrawled on a condom. Either way, Mabel Lee and Kellen are about to embark on the joy ride of their lives. Their adventure starts out with fun and games, but the blind curves in the road ahead may prove too sharp for this unlikely match to maneuver. When the dust settles, Mabel Lee may have to face that fact that she's more apt for scandal than a church pew, but will she be cut out for the scarlet letter it comes with?
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Excerpt
"What's a body shot?" Mabel Lee asked.
Catalina reared back. "My God, where did you find her, Kellen?"
He laughed and scratched his head. "Ironically, I found her right here in the crowd."
"Girl, you have to do a body shot. It's practically a rite of passage."
Mabel Lee's eyes lit up and she bounced on her seat. "Will you show me?"
"Sure. Kellen, hop up on the table," Catalina said, rising to her feet.
"You are kidding, right?" he said, giving her a look through his lashes.
"Nope. I mean, I don't mind if she does one off me, but I have a feeling she'd feel more comfortable if it's you."
"One shot, Mabel Lee," he said.
"I promise. Just one," Mabel Lee said with an excited grin.
"I can't believe I'm about to do this," he said, tugging his t-shirt over his head.
Catalina snagged an empty table and dragged it over, sliding it right up against Mabel Lee's. "Can I get a shot of tequila over here?" she called.
Kellen climbed onto the table just to have Catalina tsk him. "Really, guy? It's your girlfriend. Take the pants off."
"I'm not looking to perform a sex act, Catalina. I'm on the freaking clock."
"I'll vouch that it's on the up and up. You'll be fine. Besides, the owners adore you. You make them a shit ton of money. You're good."
He knew what an asset he was, but he sure as hell didn't feel good about taking advantage.
Catalina sighed when he didn't reply. "Look, Mabel Lee is too dignified for that. Hell, she's too dignified for this, but she trusts me, so ditch the pants, man."
"Fine." He slid off his jeans, leaving him in the G-string he'd grabbed from his clothes as he hurried out to catch her.
"Oooh, seems he prepared for the occasion," Catalina said, letting out a laugh.
He climbed on the table, laid down with his back against the wood, and schooled his breathing so he wouldn't knock the shot off his stomach.
"Where do you want it, Mabel Lee? Chest, stomach, or right about here?" Catalina asked, touching the glass to his inner thigh.
High on his inner thigh.
Like, right next to his fucking nut.
"Catalina," he growled.
"Kellen... shut up," she said and shoved the wedge of lime in between my teeth.
"You only live once, right? Put it there." Mabel said.
He lifted his head, surprised to see her pointing to the nut zone. Shit.
Blood rushed south, and his cock perked up.
Not now. Not now. Not now.
He could see the headline now. Beloved Local Stripper Causes Eye Injury with His Wayward Erection. It was a goddamned nightmare twist on the old A Christmas Story line. The fucking X-rated version.
"Looks like he's giving us a tighter gap to support the glass. Thanks, Kellen," Catalina said, followed by a snort.
Mabel Lee giggled.
And that was with no alcohol in her system. Just as long as she didn't start slapping things again, because his junk was in the swing zone.
He muttered a few choice swears through the lime that would singe Mabel Lee's ears clean off as his head smacked the table. God was a funny dude putting him in this position.
"Okay, sugar. So here's what you're going to do. No using your hands now; you keep those tucked behind your back." There was a brief pause. "Good, just like that. I'm going to do you a favor and hold your hair. Lord, it's gorgeous. You need to tell me what shampoo and conditioner you use."
"Well, aren't you sweet. Thank you. I use Kevin Murphy, but I use the cleansing creme in between washes so I don't dry it out. Have you heard of Water Lilies in Clendon? That's where I get it."
Nice they could exchange recommended bath products while held a shot glass with his knob.
"Thanks, girl. I'll check it out. Now, are you ready? On three, I want you to bend down and wrap your lips around that glass and bring it right back up with you. The liquor will slide right down. Just swallow and roll with it."
"Okay, I can do that," Mabel Lee said, her voice dropping in that way it did when she adopted that laser focus of hers.
"After, you go on up there and bite into that lime."
"Mmm, okay."
"One... two... three."
He clenched as Mabel Lee's warm breath fanned over his thigh. The glass bobbled, and what he thought might be her chin grazed his cock, making it jump, but before he knew it, she and the glass were gone.
Catalina reared back. "My God, where did you find her, Kellen?"
He laughed and scratched his head. "Ironically, I found her right here in the crowd."
"Girl, you have to do a body shot. It's practically a rite of passage."
Mabel Lee's eyes lit up and she bounced on her seat. "Will you show me?"
"Sure. Kellen, hop up on the table," Catalina said, rising to her feet.
"You are kidding, right?" he said, giving her a look through his lashes.
"Nope. I mean, I don't mind if she does one off me, but I have a feeling she'd feel more comfortable if it's you."
"One shot, Mabel Lee," he said.
"I promise. Just one," Mabel Lee said with an excited grin.
"I can't believe I'm about to do this," he said, tugging his t-shirt over his head.
Catalina snagged an empty table and dragged it over, sliding it right up against Mabel Lee's. "Can I get a shot of tequila over here?" she called.
Kellen climbed onto the table just to have Catalina tsk him. "Really, guy? It's your girlfriend. Take the pants off."
"I'm not looking to perform a sex act, Catalina. I'm on the freaking clock."
"I'll vouch that it's on the up and up. You'll be fine. Besides, the owners adore you. You make them a shit ton of money. You're good."
He knew what an asset he was, but he sure as hell didn't feel good about taking advantage.
Catalina sighed when he didn't reply. "Look, Mabel Lee is too dignified for that. Hell, she's too dignified for this, but she trusts me, so ditch the pants, man."
"Fine." He slid off his jeans, leaving him in the G-string he'd grabbed from his clothes as he hurried out to catch her.
"Oooh, seems he prepared for the occasion," Catalina said, letting out a laugh.
He climbed on the table, laid down with his back against the wood, and schooled his breathing so he wouldn't knock the shot off his stomach.
"Where do you want it, Mabel Lee? Chest, stomach, or right about here?" Catalina asked, touching the glass to his inner thigh.
High on his inner thigh.
Like, right next to his fucking nut.
"Catalina," he growled.
"Kellen... shut up," she said and shoved the wedge of lime in between my teeth.
"You only live once, right? Put it there." Mabel said.
He lifted his head, surprised to see her pointing to the nut zone. Shit.
Blood rushed south, and his cock perked up.
Not now. Not now. Not now.
He could see the headline now. Beloved Local Stripper Causes Eye Injury with His Wayward Erection. It was a goddamned nightmare twist on the old A Christmas Story line. The fucking X-rated version.
"Looks like he's giving us a tighter gap to support the glass. Thanks, Kellen," Catalina said, followed by a snort.
Mabel Lee giggled.
And that was with no alcohol in her system. Just as long as she didn't start slapping things again, because his junk was in the swing zone.
He muttered a few choice swears through the lime that would singe Mabel Lee's ears clean off as his head smacked the table. God was a funny dude putting him in this position.
"Okay, sugar. So here's what you're going to do. No using your hands now; you keep those tucked behind your back." There was a brief pause. "Good, just like that. I'm going to do you a favor and hold your hair. Lord, it's gorgeous. You need to tell me what shampoo and conditioner you use."
"Well, aren't you sweet. Thank you. I use Kevin Murphy, but I use the cleansing creme in between washes so I don't dry it out. Have you heard of Water Lilies in Clendon? That's where I get it."
Nice they could exchange recommended bath products while held a shot glass with his knob.
"Thanks, girl. I'll check it out. Now, are you ready? On three, I want you to bend down and wrap your lips around that glass and bring it right back up with you. The liquor will slide right down. Just swallow and roll with it."
"Okay, I can do that," Mabel Lee said, her voice dropping in that way it did when she adopted that laser focus of hers.
"After, you go on up there and bite into that lime."
"Mmm, okay."
"One... two... three."
He clenched as Mabel Lee's warm breath fanned over his thigh. The glass bobbled, and what he thought might be her chin grazed his cock, making it jump, but before he knew it, she and the glass were gone.
Casey Hagen pens her snarky, passionate stories from the salty air of Kennebunk, Maine. She's a born and raised Vermont native, a New England girl to the core, with Ben & Jerry's in her heart and real Vermont maple syrup pumping through her veins.
She's the proud mother of three girls and a new first-time grandma with an insatiable addiction to Fall Out Boy, and a new, rather concerning obsession with tattoos and piercings, Can you say "cool grandma?"
The inked and pierced grandma spends her time tucked away in her office, coated in cat hair, alternating between tearing her hair out trying to find the perfect words and being one step ahead of her three scheming fur babies she is positive are plotting her demise with every swirl around her ankles at the top of her office stairs.
She loves writing stories about real people, with complicated histories, relatable everyday problems, and giving them the hard-won happily-ever-afters they deserve.
And she thanks every last one of you who picks up one of her stories.
Casey is done talking about herself in the third person.
*Casey out*
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